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Cautionary Advice

People usually get divorced when one or other of the parties decides to end the relationship, it is rarely a joint decision. For this reason many couples experience feelings of anger and hostility towards each other and this can complicate the divorce process.

To avoid the pitfalls that many couples fall into bear the following in mind:

  • Try not to let your feelings cloud your judgment when you are dealing with practical and legal issues. Park any emotions and if you have unresolved issues regarding the circumstances of your break-up seek counselling

  • While friends and family can be a great help, beware of people’s intentions. Make sure you are making your own decisions and not letting others prejudice your feelings towards your ex, particularly if they have been through a difficult divorce themselves

  • If you have children ensure that their welfare is paramount. If you use them as weapons or encourage them to take sides they may get hurt and it could backfire, particularly when they are older and can rationalise what has happened

  • If your ex is causing problems for you and you have concerns over contact or residency of your children, keep a diary of everything that happens. This will provide a useful reference for you later on.
child with divorcing parents
  • Assess the long-term financial impact of any settlement, including how it will affect your future standard of living and retirement plans. Be aware of potential tax implications related to the division of assets.

  • Avoid making hasty decisions out of anger or frustration. Give yourself time to consider all options and their potential consequences.

  • Try to find solutions that work for both parties, which can lead to a more amicable and less contentious divorce. This will minimise legal costs and be beneficial for both parties and any children involved in the divorce.

  • Avoid sharing details of your divorce on social media. Anything you post could be used against you in legal proceedings.

  • Familiarise yourself with your legal rights and responsibilities related to divorce, asset division, and child custody.

  • Don’t assume that you need to spend a fortune in legal fees. You could consult with a solicitor and navigate some processes yourself, or represent yourself in court. It’s not an all or nothing approach when it comes to legal representation.

  • Divorce can be emotionally taxing. Consider seeking support from a therapist or counsellor to help manage stress and emotional challenges.

By being cautious and informed, you can navigate the divorce process more effectively and work towards a resolution that supports your interests and those of any children involved.